Inner Peace....

What can I say about Mothers Day this year......

I hope you all had a wonderful day!

It was fabulous. The weather not so much but I spent the day with Hope and Allen, need I say more. Throw in my parents and brother to the equation and it was almost perfect! We went to the Tulip Festival, it was very cloudy and somewhat damp....but the tulips are what kept us warm or they did me! They were so beautiful, the colors were radiant. It was like walking in the scene of 'The Wizard of Oz.' I couldn't help but take too many pictures of Hope, Daddy and I.
And they turned out gorgeous!

There is something about coming back each year to the Tulip Festival which brings me great joy! The thought of a mindless day, enjoying each others company and spending quality time with each other is in word: Priceless! What ever we do we just love spending time together. Every morning brings a brand new discovery, and everyday she encounters something new which makes her so cheerful. And in return makes me look at it through her eyes and experience these moments as I perhaps did as a child! Quality time is often more important than quantity. Enjoying these days together away from home, television, computers, bills and abrupt phone calls is more important and something your children will remember in the long run.
I look forward to this special day every year and hopefully for many years ahead!


When I asked Hope what she liked about this day she replied: the Cotton Candy her Daddy bought her, taking pictures, spending time with her Daddy and I, Meme and Pepe and running after the seagulls and feeding them crackers. She also said she wanted to grow tulips and that
and I quote
'she loved everything with her heart!'
(remember she's only 3 1/2)



As I sit here with overflowing warmth for my daughter, I just want to cry! She honestly says the most priceless things!!! She is a beauty! What more can I say! She gives me an abundance of love everyday. When I hear her call me 'Mama' I just feel warm and fuzzy. I think sometimes we take things to serious, we need to take more time to laugh and play with them and appreciate the small moments we have while our kids are still small and still want to be around us as opposed to when they grow up and are more independent!


Today we may paint some more rocks for the garden, play around the house and just be happy. The weather is sunny and somewhat windy but overall a great looking day.
There is nothing I'd rather be doing then enjoying today with my daughter!
Hope everyone is having a great week!
Hope to hear from ya...

Please leave me comments about your Mother's Day!
Talk soon!

Here's a thought....

Welcome to my GET REAL Posts...

Where I come clean with things that I strongly believe in yet at times to shy or scared to say it out loud! I'm so tired of feeling as though every time someone comes over to my houses it needs to be clean from top to bottom. My house is usually clean but as soon as someone says their coming over I start to panic and wonder what they will say if the house is in disorder. I think it's more me thinking this way but this is how I feel. I'm tired of pondering what people will think.

I believe that at a certain point in your life you need to stop thinking about what others may or may not say and just live your life for yourself. It's good to think of others but you should ultimately consider your feelings first.


If they don't like what they see or if they are always on your case about something perhaps you should re-consider having them apart of your life. I find it hard at times to tell people exactly how I feel about certain situations. In all reality, by staying quiet I believe we inflict more harm on ourselves. It's hard trying to find friends which you and your husband/partner can enjoy spending time with. Either they have older children than yours or no kids.....or your not at the same place in your lives as they are.
Lately, my daughter keeps asking me: What will we do tomorrow? or After we play this game can we do this? I always reply to her...'Can we just play this game and later we'll think of what we'll do then, live for the now I say!' Yet I don't take my own advice. My fiance is somewhat more laid back then I am. OK...forget the somewhat he is truly more laid back then moi!!!
My problem is that I think too much!!! About everything and anything.
My brother laughs at me...He believes in stepping back, looking at the situation and confronting it head on. He believes in not letting situations consume us. But yet dealing with it, letting it go or else it will control your life. Sometimes I feel stuck in my head. I tend to over analyze things way too much and replay it in my head over and over again...til I can figure out the situation better or not! Perhaps this is why I feel at times confused and my insecurities arise.
LIFE IS TOO SHORT!!
I read this line somewhere and I can't remember where I found it...
It goes like this:
"Why live your life in your thoughts when you can actually live your life?"



I think us thinkers need to stop thinking so damn much and simply enjoy our lives, and choose too be present in the moment. And not worry about everything around us and just let the chips fall where they may! As my brother would probably say it's about having realistic expectation's. You can't make people love you/ like you the way you want them too.
Forget about trying to always appease people and try pleasing yourself instead.

Happy Friday to you.....

Don't we all love Fridays....

Especially when looking out the window and realizing it may not rain!! I put the dog out and to my surprise it's actually warm out there! Yahooooo Perhaps today Hope can play outside which she sadly missed out on the last two days! :(

I think we may make more painted rocks such as these for the flower garden bed. It's colorful and she had a blast making hers. I wasn't sure if the paint would stay on being that we used paint for wood, glass (acrylic paint for crafts) but to our surprise it stayed on through the rain showers yesterday! So, today she'll definitely want to make more of them. Great way of letting her imagination run wild on the rock surfaces and feeling like she's apart of making the garden look fabulous!

I of coarse had to get in on the fun. The best way to make crafts is having someone right beside you enjoying it as well. Why sit on the sidelines and watch our kids have all the fun, might as well join them. As long as it's not watching another episode of Dora The Explorer or Diego I'm happy...Don't get me wrong, they are excellent cartoons for kids, educational but after watching them over and over again, I don't want to be humming that tune ALL DAY LONG! As I often do. Another is Max and Ruby, OK People...let's be honest...Is Ruby not the bossiest little bunny you've ever seen! I can't stand watching this cartoon yet the message teaches our kids to share and the enjoyment of playing together and not that of being greedy nor selfish. I get it..but no wonder Max never talks, Ruby talks enough for the both of them! And may I ask where their parents are? The grandma makes an appearance once in a while but how old is Ruby that she needs not have supervision? Can you believe there are actually sites devoted to
(I hate max and Ruby) That is hilarious!
And don't get me started on 4Squares or In the night garden....
What the (H-E double hockey sticks) is Macka Packa?? The names are ridiculous and the songs annoying!!
There are many I do love watching with Hope such as: Little bear, Franklin, Arthur,
Toopy and Binoo...Doodlebops, Toot and Puddle, Zigby, Big and Small and so on..

Allen loves to introduce her to the old ones such as The smurfs, Garfield, Alvin and the Chipmunks and the Raccoons which she says she has nightmares of the raccoons! :(
My fiance could watch them every nite if he had the chance. lol
He's still a kid at heart!
I must admit my favorite was the little blue people which lived a simple and harmonious life and battled the scheming Gargamel or as I called him Gargasmell! lol Now these were simpler cartoons. This is what Hope might say about her kids cartoons as she has kids of her own.

Just had to get that off my chest....

As we approach Sunday...Let me be the first to wish all Mother's a...

I hope you all get treated like the queens we are! Have a great weekend!
And to my very own mother, I love you with all my heart!
You've given me such love and courage.
Courage to go out there and fulfill my life dreams. If I could only be half to mother you've been to me it would certainly be great! Your a terrific mother and my very best friend!
You've been there for me every step of the way and I truly adore you!
You truly are the women I admire the most!
Happy Mother's Day to the greatest Mother Ever!
xoxox
Luv Always,


P.s Come back soon.......Hopefully I'll have pics from the Tulip Festival..

Hello friends....
Today is somewhat of a gloomy day. The weather has taken yet another nose dive.
Perhaps another good day to keep my crochet flowers going. Hopefully the weather will be nice on Mother's Day. I am anxious to spend the day with my daughter and Allen at the tulip festival on Sunday! Should be fun and a relaxing day!


As I promised here are my two Pet Peeves of the week!

• My first annoying pet peeve today is hearing people talking badly about people after they die. Yet another of my favorite television stars dies at the golden age of 86. Bea Arthur was a great actress with great spunk, she played such roles as Dorothy Zbornak, from 'The Golden Girls' a middle aged women whom shared a Florida Home with three other vivacious women including her own witted mother. She also played Maude in the television spin-off of ' all in the family.' Her mother on the show 'Sophia' played by Estelle Getty also passed away July 22nd, 2008. Two truly gifted souls. I caught the end of this discussion on a radio program but it was something having to do with Bea Arthur taking something to her grave. And it was the same when Anna Nichole Smith died, the stuff that reporters said about her was terrible. Every time someone dies in Hollywood, they talk badly about them in some way shape or form...Come on people, ever heard of Karma??? What goes around comes around....Can we not just let them rest in peace....I don't know about you but when I make it up there in (heaven) I don't want to be explaining to THE BIG GUY why I was talking trash about dead people!! Why do some feel the need to keep talking badly about them or re-hash the bad things they've done. Just like talking about the tragic accident that took Princess Diana's life, do we need to keep bringing up the accident or conspiracy around her death every year, can we not just celebrate her life and the good she did!! URGG

• On a lighter note, I dislike people who park too close to your car in parking lots.

Park between your own lines Morons!

• You should be smart enough to think, that if your parking that close their is a BIG chance that I'm gonna hit your car when trying to open my door. That's how dings and scratches happen! And if you make me climb into the passenger side to get into the drivers side...watch out! Check out this site. You can actually buy cards to place on these cars that park to close. Cards that tell them how you feel!! Quite funny! http://www.prankplace.com

As a beginner blogger....I'm wondering if there are ever days that you write a post and then think to yourself...yeah, not my greatest post yet....perhaps this is one of mine...
Please feel free to leave me your thoughts....
Have a good day!!!

Monday Funnies.....

Good morning my darlings....

I hope all is well on this fine Monday. I am so excited the weather is beautiful. The sun is simply gorgeous! This weekend was fabulous. I had some time to crochet and I went out on a date with my fiance. We dropped off Hope to my parents house for the day and we went shopping for a bit, had a late lunch and a few drinks, laughed and gazed into each others eyes (lol) and went to see a movie ( a romantic comedy- I love you man) not the greatest of movies but funny enough to warrant a few good laughs. We also shared a few kisses inthe movie theatre, I felt like a teenager again! Even though finding time is sometimes challenging, parents need to find time to spend alone with each other. When couples become parents they should remember to take time to continue to snuggle with their partner, have weekend getaways, enjoy coffee in the morning together before kids wake up. Creating uninterrupted time together is a must to have a strong partnership, I believe. Allen and I had a wonderful day and night (lol) together.


Back to Crochet....To all my fellow crochet lovers, please don't laugh to much! So, I found a blanket I want to make Hope. It took me a while but I found the one I want to make.


I'm changing the colors a bit, instead of violet, I'll use purple and eggplant... Anyways, to make a long story short, I bought two rolls of Purple, 2 Eggplant, 1 Yellow and one Green. I THOUGHT I was on top of the game. Then I started to think...not quite sure why this popped in my head but I wondered if with the new season, would the yarn all change. So, next visit to Micheal's I asked if that was true and she said yes....AHHHHHH I recently have been working one my first blanket ever and realized I really didn't have enough yarn to even make half of a blanket. Being somewhat naive I thought, I should enough yarn to make my 1st blanket ever. NOT!!! For that project I only bought a roll each of four colors. (see last post) Are you laughing yet! For Hope's blanket I did the same. But after hearing of the (yarn season change thing), I bought two rolls instead for each color. WRONG AGAIN.... This weekend I started to make the yellow flowers.








I've made about 12 flowers and only need about 99 more left to go...I decided to read the instruction slowly and carefully. Upon reading further, I had a good laugh at my own expense. I realized that my project said I needed 1,100 yrds and the skeins I bought are of 250 yards each. Therefore I need to buy at least 5 more balls. And the primary color I need about 7 more balls. AHHHH
A good rule is to always buy more than you think you need because you can bring it back if you don't need it (another tid-bit the lady at Micheal's informed me about! But the most important rule in crochet I have learnt is......drum role please... READ THE INSTRUCTION COMPLETELY!!!!
On top of which I need to go back to Micheal's soon before all that yarn is gone.
I hope your not laughing to hard at me.



I am also working on a star scarf for Hope. I will need perhaps about 20-25 of the stars, then I will attach them together and she'll have a pretty fashionable scarf. Very easy to make. I have found a few patterns to make scarfs for almost every holiday. You can make a scarf full of hearts, Christmas trees, snowman, pumpkins and so on. Very cute idea.
This pattern is from: http://stormyzcrochet.weebly.com/star-spangle-scarf-pattern.html
afterwards I will attach the stars from this pattern from :http://crafty-nerd.blogspot.com/2008/01/star-scarf-tute.html

I have figured out that if one pattern cause you trouble find another pattern and simply mix and match patterns together. (hope that made sense) lol

I have also completed these cute finger towels..Didn't take me long to make them either. Great gift idea. I made them watching a movie with Hope. Nothing to complicated. Brings a little color to the kitchen.


I also finished my very first Beanie, and it's mine. All mine. It fits like a glove. It wasn't as challenging as I thought. Will certainly make more of these!


Well I hope you enjoyed your weekend!
You know what I will be making for the next little while.. more flowers!!!
And back to Micheal's.
Another thing I find funny, is that now that I'm interested in Crochet I find I hear more people talking about it. I was in Old Navy yesterday and one of the items of the week is a crochet tank top.
Who would funk it!!
Have a great week ya'll...



P.S Sorry for the spelling mistakes...I tend to write too quickly and not re-read what I write which at times......... Oh heck! I tend to ramble...There I admit it...
lol

Who said life wasn't funny....

Good afternoon all....

What gets under my skin you ask lately? Weekdays, need I say more! lol
There never seems to be enough hours in a day.

One of my pet peeves is Women's Bathrooms. Can you say gross! Come on now, we're supposed to be cleaner than men yet our public bathrooms say otherwise. As I sit on the throne or should I say almost sitting, while holding my balance because I don't want my tooch touching the dirty toilet.

• I am amazed at the amount of people whom write stuff on the walls. You know what I'm talking about: I love so and so, this one is a B**ch and the annoying poems and blah, blah, blah. Then there are the 'I shall blow my nose on the walls kind of people. Yet there's toilet paper right beside them. Any closer and it would bite them in the a**.
  

• Nothing is worse than having to use the facilities when your traveling, you walk in and their filthy. On top of which there's paper toilet all over the floors, plenty of water around the sink and you have your daughter with you whom your trying to teach NOT too TOUCH ANYTHING in the public washrooms! lol

• Another annoying tid-bit about washrooms is the enormous gap between the doors. I mean, can I not have privacy going to the washroom, no I'm having to sit (or crouch) and have some lady staring at me through the huge gap while I pee. Or there's the 'I'm glad I have a girlfriend with me' so she can guard the door while I do my business and wish I was at home to pee or that my bladder could hold more liquids. And I don't need to mention the lack of toilet paper..Urgg
  

• Another thing which just makes me laugh is people whom get the wrong number more than once in a span of a few minutes and keep calling you. We all have made the error of calling an incorrect number. It's happens. But it's the people who keep calling, pondering why their number is wrong. When their sure that, that person lived there at some point and time. .

Do they not realize that if they call back in five minutes, it will still be me answering.

• Then there's the, can I tell you the number I called and we'll see if I simply dialed it wrong scenario.
• Or, the, I know I called the right number, Hmmm, than another pause, you can almost hear the confusion in their voice.
• Then there's the 'I'm gonna talk to you for a while caller,' like I have nothing better else to do than talk to a total stranger.
  

Well...I hope I made you laugh even for just a little while....

Well it's a sunny day, enjoy the warmth on your face, and if you Must use a bathroom I hope it's at your house! lol
Talk soon my friends...
And remember....

Talk soon...

The desire of my heart. ..

What's the most powerful word you know?
Mine is Adoption.

A word which can be a positive or negative one for some.I myself was adopted at a young age. I have always felt extremely lucky to have been adopted by my parents. As I mentioned in earlier posts my parents couldn't be the nicest to people you could ever meet. I have never in my 33 years of life ever thought of them as not being my mom and dad. They have given me so much and I truly feel as though perhaps I was born for them and as such for me. They have given me such love and endless possibilities.

As it may have been said many a times, it's not whom has given you birth but the people whom have been beside you when you first spoke your first precious word, whose been supportive of you through thick and thin, whose embraced you countless ways, whose listened to you when you've been down and whose been your biggest fan. I have struggled with mixed emotions of curiosity and at times anger and frustration. The one thing I believe is that adoption belongs on the ordinary continuum of human experience. We all face many obstacles in our lives and the feelings attached to adoption are somewhat personalized. Adoption will mean different emotions throughout one persons life.

Upon learning of the newly adoption laws, I am rushed with mixed emotions once again. Many a times, I have been haunted with the truth of perhaps never knowing whom gave me life than decided to give me up. I do acknowledge that we all have faults, we are not perfect and therefore their could be inexplicable answers as to why I was shoved aside yet I still feel at times hurt and angry as to how someone could have given a newly born baby up for adoption. Please do not try to argue with me that I should be happy that they gave me what they thought would be a better life because I am not arguing that fact I am simply owning my own feelings and expressing them how I see fit. I am angry, I'm allowed to be. Feelings such as these don't go away over night. Sadly enough I've experienced these feelings throughout my relationships with others. It is something that marks you for life. I do have issues with people dying and weaving in and out of my life because I will perhaps always have that hurt inside of feeling abandoned.

To be honest I would really like to know if I have siblings whom really look like me. It would be nice to know if we have the same interests, likes and dislikes. It would be kind of exciting to know they never lived that far away from me. It would be great to know if I came from a big family. The fact of the matter is that it would be great to know lots of stuff but in opening Pandora's box, I would half to face the good and bad things I may not want to come to terms with. It's not an easy conclusion, it's not all it's cut up to be. We've all heard of many reunions with adoptive families which have gone smoothly but I'm sure we've also heard of some reunions going terribly wrong.

The problem I have now is wanting to perhaps no more yet I don't want to hurt my parents feelings. I don't ever want to make them feel as though they were not enough. I don't necessarily want to meet the birth people who gave me life but only meet my siblings, if possible. It's a really hard decision.........

Please feel free to leave comments.....are u in the same situation?
Let me know....